Wednesday, August 10, 2011

True Love (A Guest Post by Qui)

I had a bunch of ideas for a post about school...but I guess I kind of got inspired by a couple different things to do a post about this.
One, it's my parents 19th anniversary (at least it was when I was writing this), and two I was really disgusted by how most teenagers (and adults) view relationships.

If I were to only listen to the media to learn about love, this is what I would think it is.

001) Sex.
Let me set something straight for you. Love isn't sex. I know sex is sort of a taboo subject, but I don't really care. Some of you might need to hear this.
Just because you have sex, does not mean you are in love. I have read...too many times to count in my Seventeen magazine that "hooking-up" is okay if you know what you're doing. No. Hooking-up is not okay.
Sex should be saved for someone you truly love (in my Book, your husband, but that might not be how you roll, and I won't judge you for that.) It's not something that should be squandered.
So don't think that if you put out for your boyfriend then you guys will love each other. If you're not waiting for marriage, then at the very least you guys should talk about it first.
As Kent says in  Before I Fall, "Don't drink and love."

002) Some sort of mutual attraction: emotional or physical.
Love is not something that can be easily placed. For example: I have a crush and I think he likes me back. However, I don't say "I love him!" just because I'm attracted to him and he might be attracted to me.
Even if it's not a crush and  y'all are actually together, don't just go around saying "I love you, I love you." Think about it before you speak.

003) Obsession
I know some of you are probably Twilight fans (*cough*Paige*cough*), so don't be offended by this. It is my belief that because of certain articles of media-- like Twilight -- have made it seem okay for love to equal obsession. 
In Twilight, Edward is overly protective, he stalks Bella, and watches her sleep. He doesn't just sit by her while she sleeps. That would be sweet. He WATCHES her sleep. It's books like that and TV shows and crazy Bieber-ites that have made it socially acceptable to stalk your boyfriend/girlfriend/crush. 
No, you are not showing how devoted you are to them. You are showing how creepy you are. 

004) Flings
I personally think this ties in with the first two. Now, a summer fling could go two ways. You could meet a guy and actually like him for who he is, even if you've only known him for a week or two. While I don't think that jumping into a fling is really the way to go, it's certainly better than just wanting a hot guy to have some fun with (if ya know what I mean *waggles eyebrows* ;) )

Now...this is what in my mind, this is what love is.

001) Respect
You should respect each other. I think there's enough said there.

002) Unconditional love
He should be able to see you in the morning right when you wake up and think you're beautiful. You should be able to look past all his flaws (say he's super messy and you're a clean freak) even if they drive you nuts. You should love each other through every fight. Even if you get mad.
If you run out of the house crying, he should follow you. (Even if it's not right away.)
PS: Heehee, remind you of a certain song?

003) Fights
All couples fight sometimes. If you don't, then there is something seriously wrong.

004) Have fun
You should be able to have fun together! I'm not saying there won't be awkward times, because there will. But again: there is also something seriously wrong if you guys can't have fun together. If you're always on edge around him, talk it out. If that doesn't solve the problem, I think that's a good hint that y'all aren't really in love.

To me, that's what love is. I'm sure that I could think of more, but I kind of ran out of steam around number 2 of the second list. xD

And this post kind of turned into a rant. Whoooopsy.

What do you guys think love is?

{ About the Author }

Who am I? I am a 15 year old homeschooler and a nerd of many trades. I sing, I act, I dance, I write, and I live for summer. In my eyes, vintage = life. I am one of those people who takes in your face pictures of myself. In another life, I am a fifth year at Hogwarts, a Time Lord, a Starship Ranger, and a Jedi-Master. I run a blog called Dancing Through Life.
I am honored that Paige asked/let me do a guest post on her blog. :) 


Paige said...

Aw Qui I love this post! I agree with everything you said, especially the sex and Twilight overprotective thing. Even though I am a Twilight book fan, I do think Edward was WAYY too protective and it really annoyed me throughout the series. Like, LET HER LIVE HER LIFE!

And the sex thing, I hate when teenagers think "Maybe if I have sex with him he'll love me!" No, that's not going to happen. Or 'Maybe if I have sex with him he'll stop fighting with me." Sex isn't the fixer of everything. I agree you should save it for someone you really love and think you have a future with.

Great post! Thanks so much for doing this,Qui. I really appreciate it! :)

Marisa said...

Fantastic post, Qui! SO. TRUE. Just everything.

And about the whole Edward thing, I HATE it when guys are super duper overprotective. I could never have a guys like that, I'm too independent lol. Have you read Shiver/Linger/Forever? I COULD NOT STAND SAM. Seriously, I probably disliked the books so much because of that one character. :P

alaw said...


Song. :) Taylor Swift Mine

Taylor Lynn said...

Nice job, Qui! I agree with quite a few of these, and you seem to have put a lot of thought into this. :) Well-written post - great work!

Converse said...

Awesome Qui! I imagine love the same as you do!

Even through the Twilight movie I thought Edward was a stupid head! I mean, he ruined her engine before she could go visit Jake!!! Grrrr, Edward is stupid stupid stupid (No offense Twilight fans)

I hat, e how some guys get girls in some sort of trap with sex. They will say something like, "We might not have tomorrow, so lets do it tonight", and the next thing you know, tomorrow appears and so does a baby bump. I think sex should wait until you are married.

My sister made the mistake of having sex twice while she was a teenager. First one she got pregnant and lost the baby, and second one was with the guy she just got married to and is now going to have her second child with.

(Surprisingly I know what song you are referring that part too :D)

I love this post because it can show girls when to recognize love and such!

Great Job Qui!!

Qui said...

Thanks all! :)
I was really worried it would be too rambly and way too out there (since ya know, sex is pretty much taboo in the blogging world.)

Jenna Cooper said...

Great post! I think it's so important to take this into consideration while writing for a teenage audience. Teens get so many wrong signals about love, it's scary what they could do in their life about it.

Ashley said...

I agree 100%. I haven't watched Twilight, I'm not into the vampire/werewolf thing, but Edward sounds like a creep.