My name is Paige.
I'm a sixteen year old girl who goes to public school.
This is my junior year.
And honestly, I am sick of this.
Sick of what, Paige?
Well, little voice of my readers, I'm sick of teenage girls. I mean really, teenagers in general.
I just can't take it anymore.
Walking through those halls, I just want to scream.
What are you guys doing?
I mean, what are we doing? I can't really criticize, because I do it sometimes too.
Oh my gosh you still haven't told us.
You guys probably think I'm crazy.
And guess what?
I. Don't. Care.
I'm just done caring. I'm tired of hiding. I'm over covering up the randomness inside of myself. And you know what I noticed? A lot of people aren't willing to do that.
I mean, why do we care so much about impressing people? We as people are obsessed with getting other people's approval. What is the big deal? True, I try to impress people, but not to the extent that some people do.
They change themselves.
What. Are. You. Doing?!
If this person didn't like you before, why do you think they're going to like you if you change yourself?
You are still you.
Here is an example-
There's this girl I think is completely annoying.
I've never liked her.
Even if she changed her hair, face, clothing style, and body, she'd still be HER. And, I still wouldn't like her.
And, why should she have to change for me to like her? Why am I so special?
No one is.
Not everyone is going to like you, and even though it is extremely difficult, we have to accept that.
I'm still working on accepting that...
You'll always be under there, no matter how much you try to hide.
I've realized that a lot lately.
Especially when a girl likes a boy.
"OMG MAYBE IF I CHANGED MY TASTE IN MUSIC, CLOTHING, HAIR COLOR, WEIGHT, THE WAY I SMILE AND LAUGH, THE BOOKS I READ, THE MAKEUP I WEAR, THE TV SHOWS I WATCH, AND DO EVERYTHING THE SAME AS THE GIRL HE SUPPOSEDLY LIKES, MAYBE HE WILL LIKE ME TOO!"
Yeah, that's a little bit exaggerated.
But, we've all done one of those things. Tried to mold ourselves into this different person just so a boy will like us.
I've done it, multiple times.
And now I realized, I'm such an idiot.
Those guys didn't like me in the first place.
What made me think that they would like me when I changed?
And if I had to change for them, were they even worth it?
A guy is supposed to like you for who you are. Truly. Same with your friends.
Because if you change yourself, it isn't really you. It's fake.
Do you really want fake love? Or friendship?
Constantly having to hide your true opinions and the way you live?
Please girls, hear me out. I'm sixteen, and I finally got my first boyfriend. And now that I have one, I see what a big deal it ISN'T.
Yes, it was really important to me for a long time. It was like my goal.
Now I look back and I just want to punch myself in the face.
Why? Why was that my main concern in life?
I'm in high school! I don't even know what love is!
It's. Not. That. Serious.
Please girls, please don't make this your main concern. It's not worth it.
Changing yourself for a guy is not worth it.
Comparison to others. This kills us. I compare myself to others, all the time.
Why do you think my self esteem is so low?
I need to stop. We all need to stop.
If we weren't good enough as ourselves, God would not have taken the time to create us in the first place. If I was not "worth it" I would not be here right now.
Because God would not have taken the time and energy to make me.
He puts us on this earth for a reason, and makes you you for a reason, don't change yourself!
If God made me, then I'm worth it.
I'd much rather be Paige, than Paige trying to be Insert name here.
And hey, if you don't like as regular old Paige, then fine. Good. I don't need your freaking stamp of approval.
If you don't like me as me, then whatever.
You go on and do your thing and I'll do mine.
Don't like being crazy and random like me?
Then fine, don't.
Don't freaking talk to me. I don't really care.
I shouldn't have to change myself for you.
Contain the hyperness, inner nerd, randomness, craziness, and awesomeness inside of me.
If this guy doesn't like you for you, then he isn't worth it. He's not "the one."
If you find yourself afraid to do or say something around him, afraid to be judged for picked on, then he doesn't like you for you.
If you feel the need to hide, change, or cover up any part of your identity around him, then he is not worth it!
Feel too fat or skinny around him? That's not good.
Like I said before, a little over a month ago, I got my first boyfriend.
Having a boyfriend does not make me know everything, but it did make me realize a lot.
And I want to share it with you guys.
Even in the stages of liking him, I noticed I could totally be myself around him. I was not afraid. At all.
Because he didn't judge me. He embraced it, encouraged it.
And the fact that he actually liked me back as myself? Well that's pretty darn fantastic.
I didn't have to change myself at all for him, and he liked me anyway. I was always totally comfortable around him.
The other guys I liked in the past?
I changed for them. I was afraid to be me.
And it never worked out.
With him, I was and am still not afraid, and this time it actually worked out.
He likes me for me, not some fake copy.
And he deals with my Paigeness every day, and he's still here.
I don't know how long this will last.
But it's taught me a lot.
He's just as crazy as me. And I love it. I love all of his flaws, his randomness. He's like a guy version of me. It's amazing. Yeah sure, he's not the cutest guy in the school. But he's cute to me, and amazing. I'd never want him to change anything about himself. He's great the way he is.
You guys need to find someone who thinks that way about you and someone you can totally be yourself with.
If they love you, they wouldn't ask you to change.
|Being with him has made me really realize how much I've been hiding my true self, and how much I love being me.|
So, the little lesson I am trying to tell you guys today is please, don't change yourself for others. If they don't like you as you, then they aren't worth your time. They aren't true bros.
I call all the people I love bro. Boy or girl. And I'm a girl.. and I still say it...
I even call my boyfriend bro.
Please people, find your true bros in life. The people who accept you for who you are. I know it's really hard. Just try, please. You are amazing as you are, and you shouldn't have to change yourself just to get a boyfriend.
He. Will. Come. It may not be today, next week, or next year, but he will come.
Same with friends.
Find the friends who love you for you. And if they don't, whatever. Walk away with pride and let them know what they'll be missing.
Because there is only one you in the world.
And even though you are trying to hide..
I can still see you.
And you my friend, are amazing.
"I like nonsense, it wakes up the brain cells. Fantasy is a necessary ingredient in living, it's a way of looking at life through the wrong end of a telescope. Which is what I do, and that enables you to laugh at life's realities."